When your time is right heed this.
your time is now, you are now.
You are not losing your sanity, that strange feeling that arrives at the oddest times, you need to grab hold. Use that fleeting moment to consider you, really you.
At this point you may think you know that person, we as woman are very good at faking, at facades, masks that hide truth from even ourselves.
We become so convincing that we’ve convinced ourselves to be or act the person we are suppose to be too others.
This play we preform is one that’s ends with the executioner executing herself, suicide of the soul.
That toe tingling, heart clutching, breath sucking moment is the one you need to grab, hold it in your hand and look at it, ask why, what is it? Is it life, fear, oppression, hope, desire, excitement? What is it?
The mind will try and take over, and successfully most times, making you question and doubt, if this happens throw it out and start again.
that feeling, if true, will come back, it will keep coming back.
Small steps will get you to understanding.
Be warned once you have seen this matrix hidden beyond the persona you will become a form of crazed, unseated, unsettled, fractious, unconsolable, uncontrollable, frantic, even terrified.
Because in this revelation you will begin to realise you are not the person you have become.
You now have only two options, smother and smoke out the flame, suck out the oxygen and slowly fade. Or follow the outlandish notion of breaking all the rules, throw everything in you out on the table to be revealed. Thus allowing a critical, soul minded decision on its worth to your “being”.
This process will cause extreme discomfort and everyone in your life on a different frequency too you will become what feels like the enemy. Know they are not, it’s just they will not, can not, understand how the person they thought they knew, to be totally changed.
In this process you could loose everything, friends, family, material possessions, security, reputation, but that which is true will come back.
If you hold fast through this loss, created will be something you never saw coming; yourself.
We are in circles, everything in our life is circles, without these shapes the whole universe becomes nothing.
Just because we go around and around is no excuse for not gaining ground. Circle upwards! Circle forwards! Gain momentum, discard the breaks that slow you down and try to harness your progress.
Let Litost in and allow the soul to bleed and heal, give feeling and meaning to your truth.
This is emptying, a form of self pity, if guided correctly will evolve into a stillness, a feeling of nothingness. This disconcerting notion is a blank page to which you can now control. It leaves you rational and in the power of manning your own mind. To start understanding mind vs heart.
Become the pirate of your own ship. Take back what is yours and stop letting the navigator be controlled by anything other than the compass of the heart.
Follow the instinct of the wild natures that flair up.
Howl with the wolfs, run with the tigers, curl up with the bears, have eyes like a hawk, flying above all and become your own centaur.
You may have been/are being batted and bruised. Crashed by pounding waves and torrential storms. However a rock will take all styles of abuse, be manipulated, changed, turned into someone’s art, know this, the rock no matter what form it looks like is still a rock and always will be. Be your own rock, the rock you truly are.
You have the freedom to follow your heart, its is only you who holds back. Take practical small steps, train the mind to accept the heart. Do the things that are always in the back of your being, go for that walk, get up early, chase the sun, follow the stars, eliminate doubt, learn, be naked, smile, laugh, climb, swim, run, jump, flirt, take that kiss, find your sounding board the someone who just knows you, leave all expectations, create, BREATH, engulf yourself with the essence of you.
My dear sisters STAND FAST for the ride has only just begun and this journey is yours, live once, true to you. Suck out every skerrick down to the very marrow and love every moment, let Rogue free.
Illustrations by Chelly Moore